Monday, July 19, 2010

admoNishments

Dearest paper of this post, I know you won't reply back .cause you're just a paper,when I write to you but I want you to know that I'm so stupid.
I'm so down these days and here it happened failure of some sort which brings me back to my poem of "the portrait of--",
I told myself tons of times that I am "chanceless", even though I am daring enough to speak up, I know a lost cause when I see one. A water that worked hard to reach up the most fragrant flower of all ended up swayed back down.
I know it's weird to talk to you like this wall, but you know what, that writing here brings up quite a lightness in my mind.


"oh hear me, you sun of the day and moon of the night"
"you're beauty was what I crave for, a fire to ignite"
"you're eyes of marble ever pierced my mind"
"the vine of enticement to you, continues to bind"


I really should not have though, really, oh REALLY!
Flashes of it played pictures in me, I want to go to a place where everyone is smiling, the weather today was like me all along,. .
As I play the piano, the music surrounds me of how life really is, it was like a staff comprised with different notes, you can't skip or you can't go back, play with the harmony, to maintain the balance and unity, so as not to make the music falter.


I know God is with me, that's why I'm not breakin' down or feeling really bad, He is always here for me no matter what happens, He knows my name and He won't let me down. .I believe in Him, with all I am..


I really need to get out for a while, it's really boring bein' alone and have counted smiles or laughs. . .
Like you're on you own , nahhh too bad.


and
I got a low self esteem by the way its just how it works.
soft heart pa.


that's it, i think i wrote much already.
Oh paper/wall thanks for listenin'
at least I got a friend who doesn't talk back.lol


see ya.

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